Horror Movie Survival Guide

When creatures of the night are after you, crosses, holy water, and wooden stakes won't be enough. You will need help fighting off the evil bloodsuckers. Study the vampire horror movie guide and you just might make it through the night.

Vampire Horror Movie Guide

Never trust a vampire. To him, you are just another meal.

If you are at a neighbors house and there isn't any mirrors, there is a good chance he is a creature of the night.

Never try to hunt and kill a vampire. The only one that is going to get killed is you.

If a bloodsucker attempts to hypnotise and take your wife or girlfriend, let him have her. You can find another woman.

People with pointy teeth should never be trusted.

Never visit the creepy guy who lives in the old mansion.

If you discover there are vampires, don't tell anyone. They won't believe you and will end up being the next victim.

If you are a minion, familiar, or help a night stalker in any way, don't expect anything but a grizzly death.

When you ask someone how old they are and he says "I fought for the South.", run away as fast as you can.

Never eat a pizza brought to you by a delivery boy wearing plastic fangs.

Children turned into vampires are not cute. They are just as dangerous as adult bloodsuckers.

Biting people on the neck is not, and never will be, socially acceptable.

Never drink blood because your friends dare you.

Guns won't hurt vampires, unless they are squirt guns filled with holy water.

A creature of the night that drinks blood out of a glass is no better than a neck biting vampire.

If a bloodsucker stops to explain how he is going to kill you, don't just stand there and listen, run away.

Avoid bars and clubs that are only open from dusk until dawn.

Never invite a vampire into your home.

The old guy on TV who hosts the nightly horror movie is not an authority on vampires.

If your friend was attacked by a vampire, kill him immediately. He might not of been bitten, but its better to be safe than sorry.

When you hear about strange murders where the victims have been drained of blood, its time to move.

If a vampire offers to let you live if you help him, don't believe it. If you help, its guaranteed that you will soon be dead.

Just because a hot vampire only eats "bad people", doesn't mean she's not dangerous.

Making a cross from popsicle sticks will not keep you alive.

Never go out at night if you think your neighbor is a vampire.

Never idolize creatures of the night. People who think vampires are cool end up as blood drained corpses.

Having a vampire as a dinner guest is never a good idea.

Comic books are not a good source of information on how to kill vampires.

Sunlight is the only sure way to kill a creature of the night. Crosses, wooden stakes, and holy water will usually just make the bloodsucker angry.

Just because a vampire is a famous rock star, it doesn't make him a good person.

People who can transform into bats or wolves are not magicians.

No matter how well it pays, never take a job as a vampire hunter.

Avoid anyone who visits blood banks in the middle of the night.

If there is an outbreak of grave robberies and corpses disappearing from the city morgue, its time for you to leave town.

Stay away from people who have pale complexions wearing capes or dressed all in black.